Why I started to set boundaries in my life.


Setting boundaries may sound like putting walls between you and the people you are connected. But, no! It is not. On the contrary, it is established for the well-being of both sides and their relations. It does not protect only people but also relations of them from detrimental effects of misbalance. Frankly, I was not aware of the literal meaning of the healthy boundary and the necessity of it. It was the impulse of my therapist which woken me up. Being kind, emphatical, understanding, and intimate does not require being out of bounds which most of the people who have issues due to lack of boundaries feel in this way.

We have different kinds of relationships in our lives and each necessitates appropriate limits. What strong healthy boundaries give you should not be undervalued or underestimated. Day by day, after setting boundaries, you will start to feel having high self-esteem. You will not feel obliged anymore to do anything. You will let go of the needy feeling which has made you unassured so far. You will not be worrying about little pointless arguments or heated debates and can not be bothered easily. It is clear so far that boundaries create a safer environment for us. But what about others… The benefits of other sides are inevitably clear too. They will make sure the behaviors and reactions of their partners. They will be feeling safer as well and balanced. Their expectations will be less and sensible.

At first, it will be hard to set boundaries, so we should be straight, slow, and careful. Proceeds of setting them also will not appear as fast as we think. However, when it starts to yield, it will be easier to keep putting them in each relation.